So recently I've been doing some research into our particular little quirk (as I'm sure a lot of us have), and I came across something interesting. I always assumed that a love of bondage, or things like it, were akin to other personality quirks in that they are inherited genetically. Which implies that someone in all of our extended families share the same fantasies, which can often be true. But in my case, I've never found one. But according to some things that I've read, these types of fantasies are developed as abnormalities in a person's psychological makeup. That some kind of extraneous circumstance when a person is growing up gives them these kinds of fantasies.
Now considering that fantasies of bondage, in essence are all about control. My question is this: What kind of circumstances in your life have made you develop a love of bondage?
To demonstrate, I'll answer for myself.
There are two reasons that I can think of why I have this quirk.
A: I was a pretty weak child. A lot of things upset me, I wasn't popular, and I cried all the time. I know that this is normal for kids, but I was especially bad. This caused me a lot of problems when I was boy. Fortunately I had the example of my Dad, who is honestly the strongest person I know. So as I grew up, following my Dad's example, I toughened myself up psychologically as much as I could to make up for my weakness. It seems only natural that, that suppressed trait would re-surface in the form of a fantasy of submission.
B: I've spent much of my life taking care of other people. Namely all my sisters. I have two real sisters, and many "adopted" sisters, or girl friends who I have a sibling like relationship with. Now don't get me wrong, I love them all dearly. But it sometimes gets really annoying to always have to do the giving and never the receiving. No matter how stoical and self-sufficient a person is, everyone wants to be taken care of sometimes. And when someone ties you up, they take over total responsibility for you.
So that's a glimpse into my bizarre mind for ya. But everybody has a story and we are all into this stuff for a reason. So, I'd love to hear anything you guys have to say about it. Do you agree, do you disagree? What made you in to bondage? Let's talk!
There's a permanent tension in music isn't there? On one hand you have three chords, you know, four four and three chords. Then there's the people like me, who say "Well, why don't we add a fourth chord and put it in five four?" - Bill Bruford